“Have you checked that it’s plugged in?
…
“I’m sorry sir, there is no need for that sort of language.
…
“That’s ok sir, we can proceed. Now, the ‘D-fence NEVA-MISS-ile Shield’ is rated up to 20,000 tetra-joules, can you advise of the approximate number and yield of the missiles currently headed your way?
…
“Because yields in excess of these limits will void your warranty sir.
…
“Please sir, I understand… No sir, I…
…
“Sir. Please, I must insist you moderate your volume, otherwise I’m afraid I cannot continue this call.
…
“Thank you sir.
…
…
“Sir? Sir?”
A quick 100 word post for the Friday Fictioneer’s on Rochelle’s Blog. Read all the stories here.
I really struggled with this one – I knew what I wanted to do (playing with a one-sided dialogue only story), but multiple re-writes and edits just couldn’t get me there… I just found the 100 words very limiting today.
Ah well, next time!
Cheers
KT
Uncertain Tales 
Dear KT,
I can only imagine the conversation on the other side of this phone call. This reminds me a little of a Bob Newhart routine. If you’ve never heard of him, I’ll understand but during the sixties he did some hilarious monologues with a telephone. Here’s a link should you want to check him out. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TD1MW-nyhxg Enjoy…as I enjoyed your story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thanks Rochelle – I will check him out (its a name I am familiar with, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen any routines).
Thanks for reading
KT
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Dear KT,
Reminds me of an exchange I had with a call center ‘tech’ in India once. I like your single side of the conversation POV. Experimentation stretches the writing muscles and is well worth the sweat equity spent banging your head against the 100 word limit.
Aloha,
Doug
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Thanks Doug – lets say I was ‘inspired’ by a recent helpdesk situation (calling the Australian Taxation Office is an exercise in patience).
And yes, I’m quite sure the practice I’m getting playing within the rules (the 100 words) is helping my writing overall… but sometimes that limit is very tight.
🙂
thanks for reading!
KT
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I think you did just fine. You handled an all too real, frustrating situation, that many of us have encountered, in a humorous way. Well done! Even if he had paid for extra warranty, they would probably find some way to weasel out of it. 🙂
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Thanks Caerlynn, appreciate the kind words.
KT
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I think you got it right. Let’s hope this remains fiction.
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Thanks Patrick – indeed!
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I thinks this works really well – we can imagine the frantic ranting at the other end of the line. Your speaker is so calm, just a pity s/he wasn’t a little quicker in reacting. Or maybe there was nothing to be done.
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Thanks Sarah – I tend to think most helpdesk services are not very helpful, and the idea of one in such a ridiculous situation tickled me :). I think once the missiles are flying, there is not much help to be had.
Cheers
KT
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Unique take on the prompt.
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Thanks for reading Sandra 🙂
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I think you did very well with the way you handled this. Love the idea of the one sided conversation. I “felt” both sides.
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Thanks 🙂 When I finished I was none-too happy, but I think I’m warming to the result. Cheers
KT
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I must say that my imagination chilled when I slowly realized what kind of help-desk he was calling.. Maybe it will happen when our defensesystems are off-shored soon..
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Thanks Bjorn – Sometimes I remember that all of our current defences are built by the contractor with the lowest quote… can outsourcing be far away?
Cheers
KT
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By not putting in the other side you saved yourself some words, and still told both sides well.
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Thanks Melanie – I’ve read in some writing advice that readers ‘want to work’, so you don’t need to explain or describe everything… put enough hints in and let the reader bring themselves to where you want them to be. I’m glad to hear you thought it worked 🙂
Cheers
KT
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Readers are an intelligent group. With these 100-word stories I rely heavily on the picture and readers’ imaginations.
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I agree you did a great job with an unusual format. Understood what was going on from the first line, and laughed out loud when I got to “void your warranty.” Well done!
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Thanks Kimberly – the ‘absurdity’ of this tickled me. I recently read Catch-22 – I think its still bouncing around in my head 🙂
Cheers
KT
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The rewrites and edits brought you to an original and well-written story. Nice take on the prompt.
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Thanks mate – I’ve come to think that it might have got where I wanted it to go – I just wasn’t convinced when I posted it!
Cheers
KT
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I too just had a one sided call with someone in customer service who – instead of trying to help me- kept telling me that customer service was available for me 24 hours… around the clock… Finally, after thanking her for staying up all night to help me, I asked if she could help i the next five minutes. She was able to do so, but she was not as friendly… HAHa. Enjoyed!!
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Ha – nice work. Some times you have to shock them to go off-script to get results!
Cheers and thanks for reading.
KT
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So funny. The operators have their scripts to follow and must not deviate, no matter what. I love this.
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Absolutely Margaret – the script is everything for these help-centres, and if your problem doesn’t fit into the convenient cookie cutter hole… well you might be left swinging in the wind. Glad you found it funny, I did try to inject some humour here 🙂
Cheers
KT
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This was great KT, I loved the one-sided dialogue, it’s something I don’t think I’ve ever toyed with. I would’ve loved to have seen one last passive aggressive remark from the speaker – even after whatever happened on the other end happened.
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I’m sure everyone can relate to this story at some point or another. Customer service calls are the worst.
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