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I stayed on my side

PHOTO PROMPT – © Jean L. Hays

 

Ma drove because Pa couldn’t. Before today, I didn’t even know she knew how.

She wasn’t the Ma you’d remember. No softness, no comfort. She’d become some creature of fierce strength, red-rimmed eyes, and a steel spine. I appreciated this strength, this steel. So did Pa, I think.

There was no talking. No radio. The only sound was the low growl of Pa’s old Ford as we left the funeral, a deep vibration pushing up through the seat, echoing in the hollow space in my chest.

The back seat was cavernous. You weren’t there, but I stayed on my side.

100 words.

My entry to this week’s Friday Fictioneer’s 100 word photo prompt challenge, The aim is to write a story –  beginning, middle, and end – in no more than 100 words.

The other stories can be found here. Check them out and leave some comments, or maybe even contribute your own :).

I like comments too, so let me know what you think, positive or negative.

Cheers

KT

 

 

 

Published by: wildbilbo

My name is Kristian Thoroughgood, alternately known as KT to my friends, or @WildBilbo on twitter. As of August 2015, I am forty years old. Australian. My blog is intended to be both a place for me to polish my creative writing muscles (not a double entendre) and for others to read and comment on my musings. Expect short stories, articles, essays and other brain dumps. My opinions are my own, and whilst I take care to be at least moderately informed about any topic I speak or write about, these opinions are subject to rapid change in the face of passionate arguments and greater evidence. Please note - on my blog, Evidence beats Passion.

Categories Flash Fiction, Short, WritingTags, , , , , , , , , , 27 Comments

27 thoughts on “I stayed on my side”

  9. A very sad tale, very well written. The strength of Ma coming through when needed, the child still sitting on their side of the car (that last paragraph was my favourite), great stuff!

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    1. Thanks, very kind. That end bit was a last minute add on, but I felt it resonated (so i deleted some other words to get it to fit!). Appreciate your comment.
      Cheers
      KT

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  14. “There was no talking. No radio. The only sound was the low growl of Pa’s old Ford as we left the funeral, a deep vibration pushing up through the seat, echoing in the hollow space in my chest.”

    Love the images these lines evoke. Powerful and moving. Great piece.

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. Thanks for reading and commenting Dale.

      I think all ‘Ma’s’ have cores of steel and strength, although some remain hidden till they are tested. My hope was that the story might show this, at least a bit.

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  18. KT, this is brilliant! The first sentence holds such punch, and the rest sketches a gorgeous scene. This seems like a perfect opening for a much longer story. I want to know more; it pulls me in– the makings of a novel. Love this one!

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    1. Thank you very much, that is awfully kind (and thanks for the other comments & likes too 😀). I’ll certainly check out the posts you’ve suggested on your blog… Once my kids have set me free (or gone to bed, whichever a first) :).
      Cheers
      KT

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